In The Biz

Some of you may know that I have worked as a waitress, bartender and now a hostess on and off for the last 8 years or so. Right now I am hostessing at a restaurant for some extra money, this is not my main job which I will talk about another time.

Anyway, throughout my times as a waitress, bartender or hostess I have seen some interesting things and have experienced some of these first hand. It always amazes me how some people treat their server, how they think that because this person is serving them that they can justify being a complete dick to said server. Case in point, I was working this past week and I sat this couple who were probably in their late 70s. They weren't exactly the nicest people and I could tell already (just by being with them for all of 30 seconds) that they were going to be a handful. I felt bad having to give it to the server J, but I really had no choice.

They complained about how cool it was, complained that "only fat people must eat here" because the booths were far from the tables (our booths are not nailed down so my manager fixed that easily by moving the booths closer to the table). They bitched about their food being cold, (it would've been warm if they ate it when it was served to them instead of talking for 15 minutes to people that they knew who were leaving, which is fine to do but don't complain that your food was served cold). They bitched about everything and then of course barely left J. a tip. We did everything we were supposed to do and still they complained.

Then there was the man who brought his two young children in, I'd say they were about 8 and 10 years old. The boy (10) and girl (8) were very well behaved, but the father seemed to think that they were not, he yelled at them and treated them like dogs. Example, the little girl was talking to me (which I didn't mind) before I could sit them and she walked closer to me, the father snapped his fingers and pointed to her and said, "GET BACK HERE" like she was a dog. The girl had a look on her face of Ruh Roh, (now you might think no biggie as did I at first) but throughout the whole meal he just talked to his kids with such content and loathing in his voice. I guess this father is a regular and the staff were talking about how he "Disciplines" his kids constantly when really they don't do anything wrong, and how all he does is berate them everytime he comes in. He is divorced from their mother and only gets to see them a couple times a month or something like that. My question is, why wouldn't he just enjoy his kids instead of making them feel bad all the time (hmmm maybe that's because I have those same issues with my father and I'm 32, a story for another time). I just hope that someday these kids realize that they didn't do anything wrong.

Then there was the time when I was working many years ago as a waitress at a 50s style trailer diner in the city. This was my first waitressing job, and it came pretty natural to me, I'm a people person and I like to talk so it worked out well. This diner was open 24 hours a day 7 days a week. As I got more comfortable waitressing the owners decided to try me out on the overnight shifts, Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights. I would either work 11pm to 7am or 1am to 9am. I loved those shifts and I made a ton of money. But one of my first nights working the overnight shift a friend came in with this girl that I knew but didn't really like. Shara was very self absorbed and so oblivious of other people.

So in comes my friend E and Shara (notice I name Shara because I could care less if people know her real name) anyway, and Shara is drunk off of her ass, and E is sober, trying to just get Shara to sit down and be quiet and get some food into her before going home. So I am their server, they order some food and Shara slurs, Where is the bathroom? I show her where the bathroom is and try to get out of her way (our diner at that time was filled with people) and before I could get out of her way the girl puked all over and down my back. Yup people she threw up on me, and ran into the bathroom to finish off. Needless to say I was not thrilled about that, luckily it wasn't chunks since she hadn't eaten yet and it was mostly liquid (so it was easy clean up) but still it came from her stomach. So I go downstairs to clean myself up and throw on a diner t-shirt come up and she is sitting at the table like nothing has happend. I say something to her and the bitch actually has the audacity to say to me in her little accent, "Melina don't worry it was only water" I look at her and scream in Greek to my friend who is also Greek, "If she can't hold her liquor she should not be drinking and I'm going to fucking kill her" The bitch never apoligized to me or said anything else, and if it wasn't for the fact that I was working I think I would've smacked her and dragged her outside. But I didn't because my co-workers calmed me down and said, "You have now been officially initiated, welcome" My thoughts were, "Great this happens often?"

These are just a few things that I have dealt with while being "in the biz" and have heard of some other crazy stories from others, but remember folks, treat your server with some respect (because they do handle your food, not that I EVER NEVER EVER did anything but I sooooo wanted to sometimes, it's just not in my nature), and that sometimes we are just overloaded and tired, but we are trying. Remember 18% is the norm, 20% if they are good and 22% if they are great, and if you can't afford to tip well then you shouldn't be going out (that's just my opinion).